P O S T

P O S T
I've been feeling bad for days and having weird symptoms (have you ever had hallucinations/ very vivid dreams?? I'm pretty sure last night I "got up" and turned off the dish washer 70 times only to realize I hadn't moved). I went to the doctor today, and she gave me some harsh news: I'm stressed. And the stress is causing my body to freak out. I wanted her to say "here's a pill, a remedy, a solution; now you're fixed!". To be truthful, to let go of stress is equal to "stop breathing" for me. So this evening I've been thinking about what the opposite of stress is, and what it would look like for me. I can't just switch to "unstressed mode", I wouldn't have the slightest idea how to do that. In many ways stress has become my comfort zone (don't worry my therapist and I have plenty to talk about! iļøcounseling). What I need is not a reset switch, but to be restored. I think of my dad who has always loved restoring old cars. It's slow, steady work. It doesn't happen overnight, and the process is what has brought him so much joy. So Im coming to the Lord in search of restoration. I know it will be intentional and difficult work, the work of restoring a weary and worn spirit. I believe that He is faithful to those who ask. If you are in a place of needing restoration, pray Psalm 51 with me. "Restore to me the joy of my salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me." (Psalm 51:12).